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I sobbed, I laughed, I couldn't put the book down. Only a poet could combine orgies, go-go dancing, and Nazi death camps. God, that makes it sound terrible and exploitative and horrendous, but it's not. It's charming and hopeful and entirely about the tender human spirit.All my friends: read this book.
As we stumble around searching for Truth, the best we can do is to remind one another, when we collide, that there are moments in which we are not alone.SWISH is Joel Derfner's story of his life, searching for Truth, for himself. It's the most honest account of a human being I've ever read. I can't but being awed at what he is letting us see of himself, and with that making it possible to find pieces of ourselves in it.Each chapter of this book has a central theme or event of Joel's life, and wi...
Homophobes... stay away. Otherwise this book is extremely fun and a very interesting read for someone who is very far away from "the lifestyle". If you like documentaries that look into people's lives that are very different from yours, you're probably the type of person that would enjoy reading this.
Let’s admit it: a part of gay life—especially of stereotypically gay culture—is so moronic that it’s inadvertently hilarious.We can find a few easy examples. On sexual conquests: when one considers the momentary pleasure of the actual orgasm, the drive to sleep with absolutely everyone just seems stupid. On dizzy queens: we all personally know at least one wisp of a thing who can name every guest star on Facts of Life but cannot hold onto a job at the mall for more than a few days. Yes, the cult...
If I hadn't already trapped a man I think I would totally stalk this guy! This book was sweet, sad, refreshing, hopeful and at times made me extremely uncomfortable. It is crazy to me when I read a book and I think something along the lines of, "This guy gets it. And we have so much in common, most of it not falling under the category of good! I totally want to hang out with him", but when this happens I feel connected and that makes me feel a bit more peaceful. Not a small thing.
Sigh. I really wanted to like this book, because I am a lady who appreciates high camp, Ru Paul's Drag Race, Charles Busch films and other super gay pursuits. But this narrator was SO ANNOYING. He is super insecure, and is constantly talking about how he feels like everyone hates him, people think he's ugly, he hates anyone who he feels is smarter or cuter than him, etc. I get that social anxiety is a serious problem, but when I'm reading a book about super gay things, I do not want to read abou...
This book is seriously hilarious. Not just because of the "Oh, I'm so gay listen to some of my gay antics" part (though that is there too, especially in the beginning few chapters of the book, about knitting and cheerleading etc.). But also because, as the book goes on more and more of his insights have, really, nothing to do with his gayness. Ultimately his book shows that even someone who is (by their own admission), a flaming stereotype.. is not JUST that. I mean, obviously. I know this, most...
This one really surprised me. I was looking for light and funny and ended up with a sweet, very introspective well thought out book.
I laughed out loud a LOT reading this collection of essays - Joel's very brave to reveal so much about himself and his somewhat seedy and very swishy journey. A lot of the things he put himself through reminded me of Michael Moore's documentary filmmaking style - like, hey, I'm writing a book about trying to be really gay, so I'll join a cheerleading squad, and I'll become a go-go dancer... As I read it, though, cracks in the humor let me see the deep sadness and depression this guy went through...
He's funny, he's smart, he's talented and he's adorable/gorgeous. And he's an incredible writer with a gift for taking his intriguing life and making it seem as interesting on the page. You'll laugh one minute and dissolve into tears the next.
This book put me on a bit of a roller coaster. I was definitely rolling my eyes (why did I get on this crappy ride), giggling along with the humor (oohhh, this is better than I thought it would be), and then ready to get off (the ending was just that up-down-up-down to finish it off).The start of the book was annoying - too much bitchy queen, too much cover-my-insecurity-with-funny(hateful) remarks. The worthwhile part of the book is the middle when the author opens up and comes off with more ho...
An enjoyable book written by a gay guy who is so honest it hurts - but in a good way. Derfner is a very likeable guy who anyone would like to have as a friend. He is especially endearing because his attempts to be liked (working as a Go-Go boy and allowing his penis to be fondled, being a professional cheerleader etc.) are very touching. The chapter on him infiltrating the Exodus conference, where gays go to try and turn straight was very illuminating and showed one thing: it is practically impo...
There was so much I liked about this book. I think Joel Derfner is one of the most endearing, relatable autobiographical writers I've ever read. I loved his blend of humor, neuroticism and insecurity. He's very smart, accomplished, and witty and yet also self-deprecating, and he draws some interesting connections between seemingly seperate aspects of his life.I chuckled LOTS while reading this, but it's not all fun and games- there's a lot of seriousness, a little self-pity, and even melancholy....
Swish is a delightful little romp, advertised as a man's quest to become the gayest person ever, and packaged as such, with chapters on knitting, aerobics instruction, and go-go dancing. But instead of being a shallow, if funny, look into sterotypical homosexuality, it is a much more nuanced memoir, tackling issues like the early death of Derfner's mother and his struggles with obsessive-compulsive disorder. That isn't to say it isn't funny, because it is very, very funny. But instead of being a...
SwishBy Joel DerfnerFour starsThis is not a funny book. Oh, yeah, I laughed. There is much that is amusing in Joel Derfner’s wry memoir about being gay today in America.But really, this book is heartbreaking. This is a look into a gay man’s soul. Some of what he shows us is not pretty, Some of it is, on the other hand, beautiful. I spent a third of my time reading this book wanting to take Derfner in my arms to comfort him. Another third was wanting to take him by the shoulders and shake some se...
I was really surprised by this book. Derfner did a great job weaving seamingly shallow things together with much deeper views on life. He did a great job of setting up a low expectation with the self-deprecating talk in the introduction, making the reader think he was just cranking something out for egotistic reasons, but he is a much better writer than he let on.Each chapter was an essay focussed around a theme, such as knitting, go-go dancing, and teaching aerobics. It is not a chronology of h...
I was pleasantly surprised by this. I thought I was going to read some airplane fluff about some gay guys thoughts on stereotypically shallow gay subjects. Although each piece started out that way, he always went deeper into the subject, sometimes on a personal level and other times on why those subjects are so prevalent in gay society. The chapter on going under cover at an Exodus retreat was especially thought provoking.
My friend Leslie gave me this over the weekend, and I took it with me to PTown Sunday night... It's gay alright, but also really a well done biography of a person's understanding of who he is and why. He has chapters on Dating and Step Aerobics and Musical Theater and Knitting, but when he is writing about how he likes to knit, he actually gets pretty deep into his relationship with his mother. When he writes about going to adult gay camp, he gets into how it felt to be an adolescent and the las...
The title makes this book seem like something that just escaped from the "Humor" shelf but the book itself -- save the final chapter -- is a brutal but always intelligent self-examination of one gay man's life, which -- like all good autobiography -- expands the humanity of all people who read it. In many ways, it's a book I wish I had written, which is something I **rarely** say. The last chapter, though, is about trying to capture an experience versus analyzing an experience in retrospect , wh...