1. It would be absurd to define racism as “a system of power which exists to create conflict and division, not to celebrate creativity and diversity”, right? One’s immediate response would be, why did you gloss the historical factors? Why did you gloss colonialism and slavery? And yet people (including Alok, though they are far from the only offender) do exactly this re: gender. Gender is a hierarchy formed to naturalize the sex-based oppression of women, which also has the effect of oppressing

"The best way to eliminate a group is to demonize them, such that their disappearance is seen as an act of justice, not discrimination." Wow. Alok Vaid-Menon, you legend. I absolutely love ALOK. I found their instagram profile a couple of months ago because of Jameela Jamil's "I Weigh" page and have been following them ever since. I listened to their episode on the I Weigh podcast and was in awe of them. The ideas and misconceptions that they spoke about and the passion with which they conveyed

A short read, with a wonderful deconstruction of gender expectations in Western society. Alok Vaid-Menon explores the gender preconceptions and expectations that we’re surrounded by, and how these are restricting, limiting, and harmful. Not everyone can or wants to conform to the expected binary, and like many others, Alok suffered years of self-hatred and shame trying to, consequently, it took years for them to come to a place of peace and acceptance with themselves. This small book asks us to

This is a pretty good book, but I have a few critiques:For the depth that Vaid-Menon seeks to engage with, this book is just way too short. In order to critique the gender binary thoroughly, more depth is required. My eBook copy I requested was 46 pages long. Only 46. This is way too short for a book that seeks to dismantle the gender binary. It’s only a start to the conversation, a discourse that requires all people to participate, whether they are trans or not.As a book called, “Beyond the Gen...

This is a great primer on the gender non-binary identity! I really liked the second half of the book's format, which was basically Q&A, with common questions about non-binary identity and the underlying philosophy of gender, and I can 100% see referring to this in the future.

This is a compact, deeply felt, quite lovely book that I feel would be a great primer for everyone in my life who struggles with my pronouns and the concept of being non-binary. I follow Vaid-Menon on IG and I am not too tough to say that I find them honestly inspiring; both for their creativity, the joy they seem to get from just being alive, and how they cope with the shit they put up online and in real life with with such grace. I loved this little book. "Over time I learned that where I was

This short tiny book of 68 pages really packs in quite a punch and let’s you ruminate in some realness thanks to the effortlessly awesome prose and logic of Alok V Menon.They tell us to “be ourselves,” but if you listen closely, there’s more to that sentence: “. . . until you make them uncomfortable.” Be yourself until you make them uncomfortable.In this book Alok talks about their experiences being non binary in this world, what that means for them and how people react to this, their childhood

This short and sweet book not only tackles myths and misconceptions about trans people and the trans experience, but the experience that Alok shares highlights both the brutality that is forced on trans people and the resilience in that experience. While my experience as white and not femme are different than Alok's, I particularly saw myself in the way they speak on shame (the learning and internalizing of it, but also the releasing). This beautiful, colorful, compassionate book is wonderful fo...

A perfect and compact guide to the history of gender norms, the impact they have on society, and bits about Alok Vaid-Menon's personal moments expressing their true self.

As the mom of a non-binary child this book answered so many questions I still had. It's so good.

“The narrative is that transgender people will come into bathrooms and abuse little girls.The supposed 'purity' of the victims has remained stagnant.There are no princesses. Little girls arealso kinky. Your kids aren't as straight and narrow as you think."— Alok Vaid-MenonI will not read anything by a man who describes little girls as “kinky”. Just. No. Anyone wants to comment about my non review, this book is marked as no-thanks and doesn’t count towards my reading totals and is left without a

A beautiful book to add to the collection of books I’m so thankful exist, and so thankful to get to learn from. “Small but mighty” absolutely!

Amazing book and the arguments made are logically sound and structured. 100% recommend "We thought fitting in would give us security-but is it security when someone else living their life differently unsettles us to our very core""Language and Grammar have always been developed to meet the needs of society..the actual purpose of language is to give meaning to concepts as they evolve"

I received this book as an ARC from Penguin Teen. All thoughts are my own. I learned a lot. Not just about the gender binary, but about myself..."Like if you remove our clothing, our makeup, and our pronouns, underneath the surface we are just mean and women playing dress up."Have you ever read a book that not only educates you, but also makes you more aware of yourself? This book. It definitely made me aware of the way that my own mind works in terms of the traditional binary standards. I've be...

"I learned about gender through shame." (19)I think we can all agree with this statement. In this really really short pocket guide, Alok both takes us through their childhood as well as the realisations they made as an adult. Myths and stereotypes or prejudices are debunked in a very comprehensive and almost simplistic way. It's beautiful to be told that you can be whoever you want to be. This is both a suitable guide to ease yourself into the topic as well as a way to bolster your argumentation...

Gender is a story, not a word.recently i have been thinking—and forced to think—about how to explain love and justice and diversity to people who aren't quite on the same page. books like this one, words like alok vaid-menon's, are part of the change: and i am so grateful for their existence.

This is a wonderful book! It talks in easy to understand language as well as personal things. It talks about how the gender binary hurts everyone, yes even masculine men and feminine women, and how we could be more inclusive and kind. Words aren't doing this justice. This is a book I wish everyone would read and I think everyone can get something out of. It's also not long, yet packs a punch.

“We should not hold ourselves back for the sake of convention. Instead, we should embrace ongoing transformation as a necessary part of what it means to be alive.”A good informative book, really interesting to see their POV, especially because they’re a poc. I liked some parts a lot. My main concern was that some things weren’t analysed as much in depth (providing new info, the aim of this book ig?) as i think they should, and they were too simplified. But it would be a great starter book for pe...

What a powerful read. It’s affirmative, fierce, and yet full of kindness. Alok empower all of us to focus on what really matters, be kind with each other. So many inspiring and insightful quotes:“Is it really a choice when you don’t get to select the options you were given to begin with?”“The most letal part of the human body is not the fist but the eye. What people see and how people see it has everything to do with power.”“Pain doesn’t have to be visible to be real and violence doesn’t have to...

Buy this this book. Read it. Break the binary. Ask folx about their preferred pronouns. Share it with your friends and family. Expand your mind. Support LGBTQIA+ youth. #pride